So I went to this charity even last night. I was half dreading it, half looking forward to it. I was going to support a friend who is involved with the organization. It was one of those silent/live auction things where there is dinner and drinks, you buy a table, etc. So, my friend bought a table and invited a bunch of people. If she had to go, she was going to spend the night with people she liked.
In an email she sent to all of us, she mentioned semi-formal dress. My heart stopped. Sure, I like to dress up. I have fancy shoes, etc., but I haven't had to dress up for anything in a long time and most of my dressier clothes are more professional. And after so many years in the south, my vision of dressed up is $900 shoes and prom dresses. I don't want to dress like that and I don't feel comfortable dressing like that. But then I remembered where I lived and realized if I put a little effort into looking presentable, I would be good.
I considered wearing jeans and some fancy heels and calling it dressed up, but I decided to make an actual attempt. While in Seattle over the summer I was looking at dresses at Nordstrom. I began to think it was time for me to buy a grown-up dress for things like this, but nothing really fit right. The skirts were either too long or too full. The waist was usually too long, and the chest too small. They told me they had an alterations department that could fix all of those things. I didn't feel like going through all of that for a dress I had nowhere to wear, but it was good to know I had some options for when I needed a fancy dress. For me, a person with an oddly proportional yet out-of-proportion body type, alterations are really my only option.
However, we don't have a Nordstrom in town, and I didn't have time for alterations. So... I dragged my ass out of bed yesterday morning to go to the mall to find a dress. Let me say this: I hate the mall. But, like I said, I wanted to at least make an effort. I hit all the department stores and couldn't find anything off the rack that fit. I found an adorable dress at, of all places, Target. It fit great everywhere except the chest. I found another that was so-so but it wasn't right. I found another that was a mix between 1980s color-blocking and Joan Holloway... And I fell in love with it. And it was on sale. And it was about a half-size too small. So, after two hours in the damn mall (which, believe me, is fucking torture), I wandered into JC Penny's. I have no clue why. I figured I was there, why not. What did I find? A cute, shimmery blue top with a low, yet tasteful scoop neckline and cap sleeves. For $15. That would go perfectly with a skirt I already owned. Score.
And you know what? I looked pretty good. And I had an excuse to wear my bitch shoes (aka, my pointy-toed, spikey heels).
On a side note: These things can get tedious and boring, but it can be entertaining to watch the drunk people. And, wow, was there one drunk person to watch. She was at the table in front of us. She wore a short, short dress and everyone within view of her chair was grateful for the cloth napkin she had in her lap--because we really didn't want to know whether she was wearing underwear or not. Mystery is always better. (I really wanted to take a picture but couldn't figure out how not to be obvious about it.) She was someone important and got up to talk at the end of the night, and it was painfully uncomfortable. I started giggling because it was so ridiculously embarrassing. But to give you a better visual, let leave you with this: She was the perfect combination of Snookie from Jersey Shore and Amy Winehouse and just as much of a trainwreck in spiked heels.
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